Episode #79
Ep 79: Friendship, Regret and the Joy of Breaking the Rules: Mikki Brammer on Good Joy, Bad Joy
Is it ever too late to discover a different version of yourself? In this episode of Between The Lines , we're joined by Australian author Mikki Brammer to discuss her wonderful new novel, Good Joy, Bad Joy . For more than eighty years, Joy and Hazel have been best friends. But while Hazel has lived boldly and adventurously, Joy has spent her life doing what was expected of her: being a devoted wife, loving mother and good neighbour. When Hazel is given only months to live, Joy begins to wonder whether playing it safe has meant missing out. What starts with a determination to live a little more boldly soon involves mischief, petty crime and a very late coming of age. But underneath all the fun is a deeply thoughtful story about friendship, ageing, identity and the ways we can continue to change throughout our lives. Mikki describes the novel as an ode to lifelong friendship, very late bloomers and the thrill of dabbling in a little mischief. We talk about the great romance of platonic love and the friends who don't just complement us, but show us parts of ourselves we haven't yet discovered. We also explore Joy's relationships with her husband and daughter, and the realisation that a lifetime spent avoiding conflict hasn't necessarily protected her relationships. Instead, saying the difficult things may be exactly what allows those relationships to deepen. In this episode we discuss: Joy and Hazel's extraordinary eighty-year friendship Why Mikki wanted to write about the great romance of platonic love Being a late bloomer and having more than one "coming of age" The difference between living through someone else's adventures and discovering what you're capable of yourself How our experiences with our own parents can shape the way we parent Conflict avoidance and why keeping the peace doesn't always create closeness Joy's unlikely friendship with her neighbour Rowan Ageing, invisibility and the boxes society places people in Challenging our assumptions about other people Regret as an invitation to change rather than something simply negative Why small, everyday regrets can matter more than the grand ones The idea of being "cautiously reckless" Why a quiet life can be every bit as meaningful as one lived loudly Mikki's first novel, The Collected Regrets of Clover , and the themes connecting the two books This is a conversation about friendship and ageing, but ultimately it's about possibility: remaining curious about ourselves, other people and the lives we might still choose to live.
