Brain First Parenting with Eileen Devine

The Brain First Parenting podcast supports parents who are raising children, teens or young adults with brain-based differences and challenging behavioral symptoms. We are a safe space for parents who have historically felt like there isn't a place for them in the parenting advice world. At Brain First Parenting, we see each child as a unique individual with a unique brain, who deserves accommodations to thrive in a world that is frequently not set up for people with neurobehavioral challenges. We prioritize supporting the parents of these kids and teens so that they can, in turn, feel hope and confidence and joy in their parenting experience.

Brain First Parenting with Eileen Devine is a kids podcast hosted by Eileen Devine, with 52 episodes on record and a Required Pod Score of 80.

Eileen Devine hosts Brain First Parenting with Eileen Devine, a kids show with 52 episodes published.

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  Brain First Parenting with Eileen Devine

  Ep. 51 | When You and Your Partner See Your Child Differently

  Sep 21, 202625 min

  SUMMARY - Parenting a child with complex needs can put tremendous pressure on even the strongest partnerships, especially when two parents understand their child’s behavior differently. In this episode, Eileen explores how family-of-origin experiences, deeply held beliefs, fear, grief, and our own nervous systems can contribute to parenting disagreements and how bringing curiosity and a Brain First lens to our partners can help us find greater understanding and connection. TAKAWAYS: Parenting partners don’t enter parenthood as blank slates; each person brings their own beliefs about discipline, respect, responsibility, and what “good parenting” should look like. Two parents can love and be deeply committed to the same child while being at very different places in understanding and embracing a Brain First approach. We can’t force our partner to think, feel, or behave differently. Instead, we can become curious about what may be underneath their reactions, just as we do with our children. Fear and grief can look very different from one person to another. Recognizing what may be underneath a partner’s behavior can help bridge the disconnection that often occurs during stressful seasons. Getting on the same page doesn’t mean becoming identical parents; it means developing enough of a shared understanding of your child to work together rather than from fundamentally opposing perspectives. Concrete plans for sharing responsibilities, taking turns rebuilding resilience, discussing resentment and support needs, and protecting kid-free time can help strengthen the parenting partnership. RESOURCES: Brain First Parenting - Episode 22: The Unique Grief Affecting Parents of Neurodivergent Kids The Resilience Room Membership Community The Brain First Parenting Program ======================= If you appreciated this episode, and would like to receive a weekly note from Eileen about the Brain First Parenting journey every Monday, you can subscribe to her free newsletter HERE ! You can also check out all the FREE resources Eileen offers for parents, and learn more about all things Brain First at her website: eileendevine.com And of course, find and follow Eileen on social media: Facebook Instagram YouTube Pinterest

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  Brain First Parenting with Eileen Devine

  Ep. 50 | The Disappointment We Don't Talk About In Parenting

  Sep 7, 202619 min

  SUMMARY- Expectations are an unavoidable part of parenting, but when we’re raising a child with brain-based differences, expectations rooted in neurotypical norms can create a painful gap between what we think our child should be able to do and what they actually have the capacity to do. In this episode, I draw from Brené Brown’s Rising Strong and her exploration of disappointment, expectations, and resentment. Through a Brain First lens, we’ll consider where our expectations come from, how they influence the way we interpret our child’s behavior, and how adjusting expectations can help protect our relationship with our child without giving up on our hopes for them. TAKEAWAYS: Disappointment often begins with the gap between what we expected to happen and what actually happened. Many of our expectations for children are unconsciously shaped by neurotypical developmental norms and ideas about what kids “should” be able to do at a certain age. When we believe our child should be capable of something, their inability to meet that expectation can easily be misinterpreted as refusal, defiance, lack of effort, or another behavioral problem. A Brain First approach asks us to consider whether an expectation is based on our individual child’s actual skills, nervous system, and capacity rather than their chronological age. Adjusting an expectation doesn’t necessarily mean giving up the goal; sometimes the timeline, level of support, or path toward that goal simply needs to change. Parents can acknowledge their own disappointment and grief while still deeply accepting and supporting the child in front of them. RESOURCES: Brené Brown, Rising Strong The Resilience Room Membership Community Episode 22: The Unique Grief Affecting Parents of Neurodivergent Kids Episode 19: Rethinking What It Means to Be Resilient ======================= If you appreciated this episode, and would like to receive a weekly note from Eileen about the Brain First Parenting journey every Monday, you can subscribe to her free newsletter HERE ! You can also check out all the FREE resources Eileen offers for parents, and learn more about all things Brain First at her website: eileendevine.com And of course, find and follow Eileen on social media: Facebook Instagram YouTube Pinterest

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  Brain First Parenting with Eileen Devine

  Ep. 49 | The Hidden Struggles of Kids Who Look Capable

  Aug 24, 202618 min

  SUMMARY - Some kids can appear incredibly capable in many areas of their lives while still experiencing significant lagging cognitive skills that are largely invisible to those around them. In this episode, we explore why these kids are especially vulnerable to being misunderstood through a behavioral lens and why recognizing their asynchronous development is essential to understanding the support and accommodations they truly need. TAKEAWAYS: Why kids whose brain-based differences are less visible can be especially vulnerable to being misunderstood and punished for their disability rather than accommodated. How a child’s strengths and capabilities in one area can lead us to overestimate their abilities in other areas. Why asynchronous development is such an important part of understanding kids with brain-based differences. How lagging executive functioning skills can look like defiance, lack of motivation, or a refusal to try—even when accommodations are already in place. Why a child who has age-expected speech and language can sound like they understand a situation while still struggling significantly to understand context, nuance, and what’s happening around them. How lagging relational cognitive skills can lead kids to be labeled as selfish, “too much,” or self-sabotaging in their relationships. Why understanding your child’s neurobiological profile can help you advocate with greater confidence for the support and accommodations they need. RESOURCES: Brain First Parenting Podcast, Episode 15 — A deeper discussion of kids who can “talk the talk” but struggle to “walk the walk,” including the gap between how capable they sound and what they actually understand. Brain First Parenting Podcast, Episode 40 — An episode focused on relational cognitive skills and how lagging skills in this area affect a child’s ability to navigate relationships and social interactions. ======================= If you appreciated this episode, and would like to receive a weekly note from Eileen about the Brain First Parenting journey every Monday, you can subscribe to her free newsletter HERE ! You can also check out all the FREE resources Eileen offers for parents, and learn more about all things Brain First at her website: eileendevine.com And of course, find and follow Eileen on social media: Facebook Instagram YouTube Pinterest

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  Brain First Parenting with Eileen Devine

  Ep. 46 | Perspective Taking: When Your Child Can't See Your Side of Things

  Jul 13, 202624 min

  SUMMARY - Why does your child seem unable to understand your perspective, even when it feels obvious? In this episode, Eileen explores the brain-based cognitive skill of perspective taking, why it can be especially challenging for children with neurobehavioral differences, and how understanding this lagging skill can shift parents from viewing their child as selfish or inconsiderate to recognizing a brain that is working differently. You'll also learn practical ways to support and strengthen perspective-taking skills while maintaining connection and compassion. TAKEAWAYS: Perspective taking is a cognitive skill, not a character trait. Children with brain-based differences may have difficulty shifting from their own perspective to someone else's, especially when stressed or dysregulated. Perspective taking relies on multiple brain systems, including those involved in Theory of Mind, executive functioning, and inhibitory control. Struggling to understand another person's perspective does not mean a child simply doesn't care. Stress and nervous system dysregulation make perspective taking even more difficult because the brain naturally narrows its focus to immediate needs. There are steps parents can take to support the development of perspective taking. Viewing perspective-taking through a Brain First lens helps replace judgment with understanding, creating opportunities to teach and build the skill over time. RESOURCES: Episode 3: Cognitive Flexibility Episode 5: On and Off Days Episode 32: Working Memory Episode 40: Relational Cognitive Skills ======================= If you appreciated this episode, and would like to receive a weekly note from Eileen about the Brain First Parenting journey every Monday, you can subscribe to her free newsletter HERE ! You can also check out all the FREE resources Eileen offers for parents, and learn more about all things Brain First at her website: eileendevine.com And of course, find and follow Eileen on social media: Facebook Instagram YouTube Pinterest

  ListenShow Notes
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  Brain First Parenting with Eileen Devine

  Ep. 45 | When the System Changes at 18: Financial Planning for the Transition to Adulthood with Mary McDirmid

  Jun 29, 202639 min

  SUMMARY - In today's episode, Eileen sits down with Mary McDirmid, a Special Needs Financial Planner and founding member of All Needs Planning, which specializes in simplifying the special needs planning process. Mary understands the emotional, financial, legal, and support aspects of caring for a loved one with disabilities, because she is the parent of a child with a rare disease. Her work is centered on bringing this understanding to other families who would benefit from this information as they plan for their child's future. TAKEAWAYS: Beginning the process of planning for your child's financial future as early as possible is ideal, but the key factor is having the capacity to take on some of the tasks and work it will require. Aligning the financial plans with school and educational transition plans is also ideal. Determining guardianship, supported decision making and power of attorney needs is an individual process, based on each family's situation and their child's needs. Different states have different requirements regarding social security eligibility; knowing your state's requirements is essential. It's important for parents to take inventory of all the support needs of their child before they apply for benefits so they can be clear about what level of support their child will need in adulthood. ABLE Accounts allow you to keep funds that come to your child while also staying under the $2000 limit required to keep governmental benefits. Supplemental Special Needs Trust is where a parent can save and invest additional funds for their child beyond the ABLE account. RESOURCES: Mary McDirmid and All Needs Planning ABLE Account Information ======================= If you appreciated this episode, and would like to receive a weekly note from Eileen about the Brain First Parenting journey every Monday, you can subscribe to her free newsletter HERE ! You can also check out all the FREE resources Eileen offers for parents, and learn more about all things Brain First at her website: eileendevine.com And of course, find and follow Eileen on social media: Facebook Instagram YouTube Pinterest

  ListenShow Notes

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