Divorce Dialogues

Divorce Dialogues helps people navigate divorce with dignity, clarity, and perspective. Through thoughtful conversations with experts and practitioners, the show explores the emotional, financial, legal, and relational realities of divorce, so listeners can make better decisions, communicate more effectively, and move forward with greater confidence. Because divorce is more than a legal transaction, it’s a deeply human transition.

Divorce Dialogues is a society podcast hosted by Katherine Miller, with 289 episodes on record and a Required Pod Score of 80.

Katherine Miller hosts Divorce Dialogues, a society show with 289 episodes published.

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  Episode #19

  How To Set Boundaries With A High Conflict Ex | Deborah Wilder

  Oct 1, 202628 min

  What if the same advice that helps most couples divorce well is exactly what keeps you stuck with a difficult one? In this episode, Dr. Deborah Wilder , a licensed psychologist, divorce mediator, and Certified Narcissistic Abuse Treatment Clinician at the Center for Therapy and Mediation , breaks down how emotional abuse and coercive control change the rules of divorce, and how to tell the difference between a hard marriage and a harmful one. Deborah walks through the warning signs your body picks up before your mind does, why compromise can backfire with a high-conflict ex, and a simple communication tool to protect your energy without escalating the fight. In this episode, you'll learn: How to tell the difference between normal conflict and coercive control; Why gaslighting makes you question your own reality; The BIFF method for communicating with a difficult ex; and How to protect your kids without disparaging the other parent Highlights: (00:00) Meet Dr. Deborah Wilder (03:19) What Actually Defines A High-Conflict Divorce (07:43) The Body's Early Warning Signs Of Abuse (08:37) Why Gaslighting Works (11:09) Common Traits Of A Narcissistic Partner (13:55) Isolation, Financial Abuse, And Control Tactics (15:58) Why It's Never Personal (18:42) The BIFF Method For Boundaried Communication (22:06) Protecting Kids From Being Used As Pawns (25:07) Redefining What Divorcing With Dignity Means About our guest, Dr. Deborah Wilder LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/deborah-s-wilder-ph-d-5a016033/ Center for Therapy and Mediation: https://www.drdeborahwilder.com/ About Divorce Dialogues and Miller Law Group Katherine’s LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/kemiller1/ Miller Law Group: https://miller-law.com/ More on her book “The Emotionally Savvy Divorce” at: https://katherinemiller.com/book/ Created in partnership with Share Your Genius: shareyourgenius.com

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  Episode #18

  How to Talk to Kids About Divorce | Dr. Korie Leigh

  Sep 24, 202631 min

  Divorce doesn't have to be a conversation you dread having with your kids. What if it's the beginning of showing them they can get through something hard? Childhood Grief Specialist and Award-Winning Author Dr. Korie Leigh joins the show to break down how to talk to kids about divorce without overwhelming them or trying to make it painless. Katherine and Korie explore how to figure out what your child already knows before you say anything, how the conversation shifts by age, and why getting it wrong the first time isn't the failure it feels like. Listen in for practical, developmentally grounded guidance you can use today. What you'll learn: Why divorce is a form of loss for kids, even when it's the right decision for the family; How to "dose" information about divorce so kids aren't overwhelmed; How to adjust the conversation based on your child's age; and What actually gives kids a sense of safety and stability across two homes Highlights: (00:00) Meet Dr. Korie Leigh (03:11) What kids are actually grieving during divorce (04:46) Why parents need to process their own emotions first (09:26) Why "treat it like a business deal" is bad advice (12:15) Why you should start by asking kids what they already know (13:48) What "dosing" information actually means (15:39) How the conversation should change by a child's age (22:53) What gives kids the greatest sense of safety (26:11) One piece of advice before you have "the talk" (28:32) The reframe every parent needs about protecting kids from grief About our guest, Dr. Korie Leigh Website: korieleighphd.com LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/korie-leigh-phd-ccls-ft About Divorce Dialogues and Miller Law Group Katherine’s LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/kemiller1/ Miller Law Group: https://miller-law.com/ More on her book “The Emotionally Savvy Divorce” at: https://katherinemiller.com/book/ Created in partnership with Share Your Genius: shareyourgenius.com

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  Episode #17

  The Self-Fulfilling Prophecy Behind High-Conflict Divorce | Erin Levine

  Sep 17, 202630 min

  Could securing a divorce attorney actually heighten complications instead of safeguarding your interests? Certified family law specialist, mediator, and Hello Divorce founder and CEO Erin Levine explains why navigating a divorce doesn't have to mean choosing between going at it completely alone or turning everything over to a lawyer. Erin shares the three problems she saw repeatedly in twenty years of practicing family law: unpredictable cost, unnecessary conflict, and a legal-only approach that ignores everything else changing in someone's life. She and Katherine talk through how transparency and the right mix of support, whether that's a mediator, a financial expert, or a lawyer for one piece of the process, can lower the temperature of a divorce instead of raising it. Learn how to figure out what kind of help you actually need, and how to stay the decision-maker in your own divorce. What you'll learn: Why the "lawyer up or DIY" choice is a false one, and what exists in between; The three biggest problems driving people away from traditional divorce; How transparency in the process can lower conflict between spouses; and Why relying on AI for major divorce decisions comes with real risk Highlights: (00:00) Meet Erin Levine (05:06) The three problems with traditional divorce: cost, conflict, and complexity (07:39) What exists between DIY and "lawyer takes over" (08:43) Inside Hello Divorce: procedural help vs. expert support (11:59) How a divorce navigator helps you figure out what you need (14:35) Why silence and lack of transparency make divorce messier (21:15) Where AI helps, and where it creates false confidence (23:54) How to stay the decision-maker with your own lawyer (28:57) What "protecting yourself" actually means About our guest, Erin Levine LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/erinlevine Hello Divorce: https://hellodivorce.com/ About Divorce Dialogues and Miller Law Group Katherine’s LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/kemiller1/ Miller Law Group: https://miller-law.com/ More on her book “The Emotionally Savvy Divorce” at: https://katherinemiller.com/book/ Created in partnership with Share Your Genius: shareyourgenius.com

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  Episode #15

  The Mortgage Mistake That Traps Divorcing Spouses | Jody Bruns

  Sep 10, 202629 min

  Most people going through divorce ask, "How do I keep the house?" But what if that's the wrong question entirely? Katherine sits down with Jody Bruns , founder and president of the Divorce Lending Association and author of A House Divided: A Guide to Mortgage Financing and Divorce , to unpack the emotional and financial complexities of housing decisions during divorce. Jody explains why treating the house as a purely financial asset misses the point, and why feasibility today doesn't guarantee sustainability tomorrow. She and Katherine dig into the hidden costs people overlook, from insurance and title risk to the tax trade-offs of holding onto a low mortgage rate, and why "can I qualify" is a very different question than "can I actually afford my life." Get insights about separating the emotional pull of the family home from the numbers, and why real stability might mean letting go. In this conversation, you'll learn: Why the mortgage math is only part of the equation, and what "feasible, affordable, and sustainable" really means; The hidden risks in insurance and title that most divorcing homeowners never see coming; Why refinancing hesitancy over a low interest rate can cost you more than it saves; and How reframing "how do I keep the house" as "how do I create a stable future" changes the decision entirely Highlights: (00:00) Meet Jody Bruns (00:58) Why the house is so hard to let go of (03:16) Why the house sits at the intersection of finances and identity (05:01) The Colorado mom and the baseball tournament story (07:40) Why "treat it like a business deal" is bad advice (09:13) Home, security, and identity (10:31) The onboarding process and building a Plan B (13:06) The stories people tell themselves about affording the house (20:17) Legal vs. mortgage pitfalls, and the "netting effect" (23:35) Insurance and title risks after divorce (25:53) What helps people make thoughtful housing decisions (26:44) The better question to ask instead of "how do I keep the house" About our guest, Jody Bruns LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jodylbruns/ Divorce Lending Association: https://www.divorcelendingassociation.com/ About Divorce Dialogues and Miller Law Group Katherine's LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/kemiller1/ Miller Law Group: https://miller-law.com/ More on her book "The Emotionally Savvy Divorce" at: https://katherinemiller.com/book/

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  Episode #14

  Your Custody Battle Is Hurting Your Kid More Than Your Divorce | Michael Saini

  Sep 3, 202628 min

  When a child says “I don’t want to go,” the most important question may be: why? In this episode, Michael Saini , professor and Factor-Inwentash Chair in Law and Social Work at the University of Toronto , breaks down how courts, lawyers, and parents can separate genuine safety concerns from the noise of custody conflict. Drawing on nearly two decades of research and parenting plan evaluations, Michael explores why labels like alienation or abuse can miss the complexity of a child’s experience, why a quiet child may still be struggling, and what helps protect children through separation. Tune in to learn why conflict, not divorce itself, is what actually harms kids, and how one competent parent can be enough to help a child come through separation okay. In this episode, you'll learn: How to tell the difference between alienating behavior and a genuine safety concern; Why professionals shouldn't assume a quiet or agreeable child is doing fine; How to reframe anger toward a co-parent into identifying the real underlying worry; and Why "good enough" parenting, not perfect parenting, is what protects kids through divorce. Highlights: (00:00) Meet Michael Saini (03:14) What splitting looks like and why kids get caught in the middle (05:10) Why it's so hard to separate real risk from conflict fallout (06:40) Alienation, denigration, and the umbrella of parent-child contact problems (08:52) The research-backed assumptions professionals get wrong (11:48) The conflict-driven custody narrative and how it takes shape (15:18) Winnicott's "good enough" parenting and why it protects kids (22:17) What to do when a safety concern is genuine (24:10) The one reframe that changes how you handle co-parent anger (25:10) Why exposure to conflict, not divorce itself, is what harms kids About our guest, Michael Saini LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/michael-a-saini-5693044a/ University of Toronto, Factor-Inwentash Faculty of Social Work: https://socialwork.utoronto.ca/profiles/michael-saini/ About Divorce Dialogues and Miller Law Group Katherine's LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/kemiller1/ Miller Law Group: https://miller-law.com/ More on her book "The Emotionally Savvy Divorce" at: https://katherinemiller.com/book/

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