Don't Quote Us with Al and Val

Two girls giving opinions no one asked for. Some episodes get deep and others go off the deep end.

Don't Quote Us with Al and Val is a comedy podcast hosted by Alani and Valeria, with 56 episodes on record and a Required Pod Score of 80. PitchCentric scores this show on Booking Probability, Listen Score, and live audience signals refreshed every 24 hours.

Alani and Valeria hosts Don't Quote Us with Al and Val, a comedy show with 56 episodes published.

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  Don't Quote Us with Al and Val

  The Friendship Audit: Are Your Friendships Actually Good for You?

  Aug 19, 202644 min

  It might be time to audit your friendships. In this episode of Audit August, we’re looking beyond how long you’ve been friends with someone and asking a harder question: How does this friendship actually make me feel? We’re talking about performative friendships, one-sided effort, unspoken competition, and the relationships where you find yourself shape-shifting depending on who you’re around. We break down the difference between friendships that leave you feeling supported and energized versus the ones that consistently leave you feeling drained, insecure, or like you have something to prove. We also get into what it looks like when the effort isn’t equal, how to recognize the difference between a friend who genuinely supports you and one who may be quietly competing with you, and why history alone isn’t always a good enough reason to keep a friendship the same. Consider this your friendship audit: Who gets the real version of you? Who pours back into you? Where are you overextending yourself? And which friendships might need stronger boundaries, a different level of access, or an honest conversation? Because auditing your friendships doesn’t automatically mean cutting people off. Sometimes it means getting honest about what the relationship actually is. In this episode: Performative vs. authentic friendships Shape-shifting and losing yourself in friendships Draining vs. energizing relationships One-sided friendships and unequal effort Supportive friends vs. competitive friends Friendship boundaries and changing levels of access Outgrowing friendships without making someone the villain Questions to ask during your own friendship audit Part of our Audit August series on Don’t Quote Us with Al and Val .

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  Don't Quote Us with Al and Val

  Why Are We So Bad With Money? | Audit August

  Aug 12, 202659 min

  It’s Week 2 of Audit August, and we’re asking a question a lot of us have probably wondered at some point: Why are we so bad with money? The answer is a lot more complicated than “just make a budget.” This week, we’re auditing our money habits and digging into the psychology behind how we spend, save, avoid, and stress about money. We talk about how our childhood experiences shape our relationship with finances, why financial stress can affect our mental health, how emotional spending and avoidance become coping mechanisms, and why knowing what we should do with money doesn’t always mean we actually do it. We’re also breaking down the financial education many of us wish we got sooner. What does APR actually mean? How does credit card interest work? Why can minimum payments keep you in debt for years? Track your spending for seven days and ask yourself one question after every purchase: Why did I buy this? Then take a look at your debts, APRs, and recurring expenses and choose one small financial action to take this week. No shame. No “stop buying coffee” lecture. Just two friends trying to understand their money a little better. Welcome to the Money Audit

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  Don't Quote Us with Al and Val

  Audit August: Is Your Life Actually Working?

  Aug 5, 20261 hour

  Welcome to Audit August ! This month, we’re challenging ourselves, and all of you, to take an honest look at the areas of life that often run on autopilot. Instead of trying to become completely different people overnight, we’re asking one simple question: Is the life we’re building actually working for us? In this week’s episode, we’re kicking off the series with a Life Audit . Using the Life Wheel, we rate different areas of our lives, including: physical & mental health, sleep, finances, career, relationships, family & friendships, confidence, free time, purpose & personal growth. We share the areas where we’re thriving, the areas that need more attention, and the honest conversations that came from rating ourselves. We also talk about: What gives us energy and what quietly drains it and whether our time and habits truly reflect our priorities. This episode is an invitation to pause, reflect, and reset. Whether you’re feeling stuck, overwhelmed, or simply ready for a fresh start, we hope you’ll join us for Audit August and complete your own Life Audit alongside us. This week’s challenge is simple. Rate your own Life Wheel, identify one thing to keep, one thing to cut, and one thing to start. We’d love to hear what you discover, so send us a message or share your biggest takeaway with us. Here’s to building a life that feels intentional, one audit at a time

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  Don't Quote Us with Al and Val

  Love Island Finale Recap: Winners, Drama, Million Dollar Nannies & Our Wildest Takes

  Jul 29, 20261h 8m

  Love Island is officially over, and we have a lot to say. In this week’s Group Chat Recap, we’re breaking down the Love Island finale, sharing our thoughts on the winners, the biggest moments of the season, and what we’ll be watching now that the villa has closed its doors. We also dive into Million Dollar Nannies , dream about the cosmetic procedures we’d get if money were no object, and somehow end up talking about Buc-ee’s sponsorships, skinny jeans, and Al’s controversial opinion that pecans are the worst nut. Plus, this is our first episode wearing clip-on mics instead of holding them—and let’s just say it took some getting used to. In this episode: Love Island finale recap and our biggest takeaways What we’re watching after Love Island First thoughts on Million Dollar Nannies Cosmetic procedures we’d get with unlimited money Al gets roasted by her teenage clients for wearing skinny jeans Our dream Buc-ee’s sponsorship The Great Pecan Debate Follow us on Instagram @lifewithalandval and let us know: Were you happy with the Love Island winners? What should we recap next?

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  Don't Quote Us with Al and Val

  We Need to Talk About Our Spending

  Jul 22, 20261 hour

  Being a girl is expensive... and apparently, so is trying to buy a house. This week, we're having an honest conversation about our spending habits, the little purchases that add up, and how we're trying to be more intentional with our money. As we get closer to 30, we're realizing that every little purchase is either getting us closer to our goals or further away from them. We're talking about the small habits we're changing, the "little treats" we're rethinking, and what it looks like to choose long-term dreams without giving up the joy of being girls. Because this isn't about never treating yourself, it's about making room for the future we're dreaming about while still enjoying the present. If you've ever looked at your bank account and wondered where all your money went... this one's for you.

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