Episode #85
Patriarchy, Oppression & Insidious Trauma with Erica Smith
Erica Smith returns to How to Relate for a light conversation (haha) on the patriarchy, insidious trauma, and what oppression does to our closest relationships. Why "the patriarchy" surged in cultural vocabulary post-2020, and how it intersects with racism and the need to re-center attention away from marginalized communities Defining the patriarchy: from a "wealthy white men" lens to Terry Real's framework on masculinity, invulnerability, and emotional suppression Boundaries vs. control — how boundary language gets weaponized to manage other people's behavior instead of one's own exposure "Insidious trauma" and death by a thousand paper cuts: the cumulative nervous-system toll of everyday dismissal, code-switching, and hypervigilance Family strategies for safety — advocating in medical settings, "the talk" before a breakup, staying alert in unfamiliar spaces Performative allyship vs. authentic accountability, and why announcing your values isn't the same as living them Affinity spaces: when they help, when they isolate, and why the burden of initiating hard conversations should shift toward the group causing harm Individual-level change as the starting point for structural change — noticing your own nervous system, choosing regulating relationships Erica's Resources: Whole Mentality: https://www.wholementality.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/itsericakendra/ Website: https://www.brittaniprocknow.com/ IG: https://www.instagram.com/brittani_procknow Intimacy Workbook: https://howtorelate.kit.com/b956780219 Newsletter: https://howtorelate.kit.com/e9f87bb2dc Sponsor: Larry's Coffee — https://larryscoffee.com/relate
