Life on Ten
The Psychology Behind Manipulative Leaders And How Teams Fight Back
Send us Fan Mail Some leaders are simply overwhelmed. Others are playing a darker game. We sit down with Dr Ashley Parrish, an organizational and leadership psychologist and Navy veteran, to name what many of us sense but struggle to describe: the difference between toxic leadership and dark leadership, and why that difference matters when your career, your confidence, and your team culture are on the line. We start with the real-life strain of stepping into a huge leadership role where the job is no longer just about physicians, it is about hospital operations, quality, strategy, and navigating a flood of personalities across departments and even across hospitals. From there, Ashley shares the story behind her firm, Feeding the Wolf, and the simple parable that cuts through messy workplace dynamics: there are competing instincts in all of us, and the one that “wins” is the one we reinforce. Then we get concrete. Ashley defines dark leadership as unethical manipulation for personal gain and contrasts it with toxic leadership that often stems from low self-awareness. We unpack how destructive behavior can be driven by environment, culture, and biology, why organizations tolerate it when “it works,” and why true dark triad patterns (narcissism, Machiavellianism, psychopathy) rarely change. You will also hear practical tools for leadership development and team protection, including GRASS (growth mindset, resiliency, adaptability, self-awareness, self-discipline), the three Cs (compassion, courage, competence), the “drowning leader” metaphor, and how charisma can make people feel seen in ways that are inspiring or dangerous. If you’ve ever wondered what you’re dealing with at work and what to do next, press play. Subscribe, share with a friend, and leave a review. What kind of leadership are you seeing right now?
