Episode #39
Alexander Hayden: I Kissed A Boy, Growing Up Gay Where It Was Illegal & Finding Himself
Growing up in St Kitts & Nevis, Alexander Hayden never questioned whether he was gay because, as he explains, “I didn’t know the closet existed.” In this episode of Queer Talker, Alexander shares what it was like growing up in the Caribbean, where same-sex relationships were illegal, moving to boarding school in the UK, and slowly discovering who he really was. We talk about code-switching between two versions of himself, the emotional moment he returned home after the law changed, living with a visible difference, and why representation matters for LGBTQ+ people growing up in countries where acceptance is still a work in progress. Alexander also takes us behind the scenes of I Kissed A Boy, reveals what it was really like arriving as the final bombshell, reflects on the show’s cancellation, and explains how the experience changed his life. This is an honest conversation about identity, confidence, belonging and learning that you don’t have to hide who you are. Chapters 00:00 Introduction and Queer Panic 04:58 Growing up in the Caribbean and cultural identity 07:02 Discovering the queer community and first experiences 10:11 Coming out and self-acceptance journey 14:55 Decriminalization in Nevis and returning home 16:59 Using platform to support Caribbean LGBTQ+ communities 20:46 Dealing with visible differences and confidence 24:56 Joining 'I Kissed a Boy' and show experience 29:51 Lessons learned from the show and personal growth 36:00 Advice to younger self and LGBTQ+ community Connect with Ben Cicchetti: Website - https://www.queertalker.com Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/bencicchetti/ YouTube - https://www.youtube.com/@BenCicchetti TikTok - https://www.tiktok.com/@bencicchetti
