
Storytime with Lori
Cancer Got a Chapter. Not the Whole Damn Book. | Tara Akins
I met Tara Akins before I knew most of her story and I am glad I did. We'd crossed paths before, but it was sitting in a box at a San Diego Wave game with our mutual friend Enzo where we actually got to know each other. And somewhere between soccer, laughing, talking about life and discovering we're both Leos—which honestly explained a few things —I remember thinking, I really like this woman. Not because I knew what she'd survived. I didn't. I liked her . And that's important, because Tara has one hell of a story, but I didn't want to sit down with her and spend 45 minutes talking about cancer. So we didn't. We talked about growing up in a family that showed up physically but didn't always give her the emotional safety she needed. We talked about learning to read a room, keeping everybody happy and becoming a people-pleaser before you even realize that's what you're doing. And Tara said something that I think a lot of us learn way too fucking late: you shouldn't have to perform to earn love. Pasted text We talked about her wife. Her kids. Chosen family. Being queer. Being a mom. Working in healthcare for more than two decades and genuinely loving taking care of people. And then, yes, we talked about cancer. Tara went into the ER thinking she might have a herniated disc. She left with a completely different life. Kidney failure. Lesions throughout her bones. Multiple myeloma. Two weeks in the hospital. Treatment. Eventually a bone marrow transplant. Pasted text But here's the part that got me. She didn't really fall apart when everything was happening. She fell apart afterward . When she wasn't working. Wasn't taking care of patients. Wasn't taking care of everybody else. Wasn't being the version of Tara she'd spent years knowing how to be. She had to figure out who the hell she was when she wasn't useful. Eventually she realized: “Me being Tara is enough.” Pasted text Yeah. Sit with that one for a minute. And because Tara refuses to bullshit about any of this, there's no magical post-cancer montage here either. She went to therapy. She took medication when she needed it. She struggled with her changing body. She watched the Food Network while she was nauseous and dreamed about what she could eat when she felt better. She admits she didn't suddenly start exercising like crazy or become someone who loves drinking water. Thank God. A real person. Pasted text This is #cancer, #multiplemyeloma and #cancersurvivorship, yes. But it's also marriage, #chosenfamily, motherhood, being #lgbtq, #mentalhealth, #therapy, healthcare, #peoplepleasing, boundaries, identity and trying to figure out who the fuck you are when life changes the rules without asking permission. Somewhere near the end, two Leos started talking about roaring. Turns out a roar isn't always loud. Sometimes it's letting someone take care of you. Sometimes it's saying no. Sometimes it's admitting you're not okay. And sometimes it's finally realizing you don't have to do a damn thing to earn your place here. Tara, thank you for giving me you . ❤️ ️ Storytime with Lori — The Story Underneath the Story #storytimewithlori #tarakins #multiplemyeloma #cancersurvivor #lgbtq #chosenfamily #mentalhealth #womenshealth #patientadvocacy #womeninhealthcare #selfworth #boundaries #healing #podcast


