Temporally Scripted

Ever notice how the people who claim to have all the answers usually have the most boring lives? We spent our twenties in underground clubs and festival fields, then built businesses in Vietnam. Now we're watching Western culture implode from 8,000 miles away. From historical figures to simulation theory, from AI's impact to why clever people often end up miserable - we tackle questions that keep curious minds awake. We're not experts claiming to have it all figured out, just two guys navigating a complicated world. This isn't about optimisation or morning routines. This is for people who know the best insights come from strange places. New episodes of Temporally Scripted are available every Saturday. Join your slightly questionable guides to personal growth. Your reality might never be the same.

Temporally Scripted is a society podcast hosted by Unknown Host, with 71 episodes on record and a Required Pod Score of 80. PitchCentric scores this show on Booking Probability, Listen Score, and live audience signals refreshed every 24 hours.

Unknown Host hosts Temporally Scripted, a society show with 71 episodes published.

Our AI reads these to draft pitches. Use them as grounding for a pitch that cites a real guest and a specific topic.

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  Temporally Scripted

  ANDY BURNHAM: THE PM NOBODY VOTED FOR

  Jul 25, 202617 min

  Send us Fan Mail Andy Burnham is the new UK Prime Minister. Number seven in ten years. Nobody voted. Obviously. Keir Starmer is out, the King of the North is in, and Britain's revolving door gets another spin. His opening offer: 20 percent off your pint, a vague gesture at North Sea oil, and working from Manchester one day a week, which is apparently what levelling up looks like now. The money for all of it is coming from you, because the British public "can handle a bit more tax", says a man whose electorate currently numbers zero. We run the numbers on how many recent PMs actually won an election (two), why taxing the rich just buys them a one-way ticket out, and why Count Binface remains the only candidate with a mandate. Chapters 00:00 Who voted for you? Nobody 01:21 20 percent off the pub 03:38 A coronation, not an election 05:38 The Manchester office ploy 07:58 Oil, gas and buzzwords 09:38 Where's the money coming from? 12:18 Britain's brain drain 14:02 Count Binface for PM #AndyBurnham #UKPolitics #BritishComedy Subscribe to our channel on YouTube Check out our website at temporallyscripted.com Follow us on X, too!

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  Temporally Scripted

  SAGRADA FAMILIA TOOK 144 YEARS. YOUR TOWN GOT A GREY CAR PARK

  Jul 22, 202612 min

  Send us Fan Mail The Sagrada Familia is finally at full height after 144 years. Your town centre took a weekend to plan. Gaudi's masterpiece vs modern British architecture, and why we stopped building beautiful things. Barcelona spent a century and a half building something designed to link heaven and earth. Britain, in the same period, produced Milton Keynes. Jack and Adam ask why every new building is a rectangle in a cement or glass finish, why nobody trains stonemasons anymore (the trade is dying out like the name Egbert), whether a dodgy contractor has snuck some cheeky rebar into Gaudi's cathedral, and why China could allegedly knock out a copy by 2032, a metre taller, obviously. Completion is scheduled for 2036. Spanish 2036, so bring a book. 00:00 Barcelona spent 144 years on one church 01:39 When did buildings stop being beautiful? 03:38 "Let's make a big one" is not a design philosophy 04:33 Building things you will never see finished 06:17 Milton Keynes, Slough and other crimes 08:47 Cheeky rebar and dodgy contractors 09:49 Spanish 2036 and the fiesta problem #SagradaFamilia #Architecture #BritishComedy Subscribe to our channel on YouTube Check out our website at temporallyscripted.com Follow us on X, too!

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  Temporally Scripted

  OPENAI IS LOSING $20 BILLION A YEAR. SO WHO PAYS?

  Jul 20, 202613 min

  Send us Fan Mail OpenAI loses $20 billion a year. Its fix? Offer the US government 5%. The AI bubble, ChatGPT's new ads, and the leaked financials nobody at OpenAI wanted you to see. Adam explains the entire AI economy using a sandwich that costs $40 to make and sells for $2, which is somehow also OpenAI's actual business model. Jack works out that the endgame is a taxpayer bailout, a financial strategy previously reserved for banks and British water companies. Meanwhile Meta and SpaceX are quietly selling shovels to the gold rush and edging towards the exit. The UK, being years behind in the AI race, may accidentally be the only winner. Chapters: 00:00 The $40 sandwich problem 00:45 Why OpenAI offered Washington 5% 01:31 The leaked financials 04:07 The worst business pitch ever made 06:50 ChatGPT is showing you ads now 08:50 Too big to fail? Bailouts and shovel sellers 11:07 Replacing ourselves with AI #OpenAI #AIBubble #ChatGPT Subscribe to our channel on YouTube Check out our website at temporallyscripted.com Follow us on X, too!

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  Temporally Scripted

  TRUMP PHONED FIFA AND THE RED CARD DISAPPEARED

  Jul 13, 202612 min

  Send us Fan Mail Trump phoned FIFA, a World Cup red card vanished, and the USA lost 4-1 anyway. FIFA corruption, VAR conspiracies, and Folarin Balogun's very convenient reprieve. The 2026 World Cup has gone full pantomime. The President rang Gianni Infantino, FIFA's disciplinary committee discovered red cards are optional if you ask nicely, and Belgium's appeal was rejected on the grounds that Belgium wasn't involved. Meanwhile the VAR booths keep filling with fans of whoever needs to win, and Jack and Adam arrive at the only sensible fix: sack every referee and let the robots do it. Recorded before England drew Argentina in the semi, so the theory gets tested on Wednesday. 00:00 FIFA is corrupt, apparently 01:00 The very independent review 03:00 VAR and the Egypt problem 05:00 Referees are only human 08:50 Just make the referees AI 09:45 England's penalty destiny #WorldCup2026 #FIFA #BritishComedy Subscribe to our channel on YouTube Check out our website at temporallyscripted.com Follow us on X, too!

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  Temporally Scripted

  COULD COUNT BINFACE ACTUALLY BEAT NIGEL FARAGE

  Jul 10, 202610 min

  Send us Fan Mail Count Binface may be Nigel Farage's ONLY opponent in the Clacton by-election. Every major UK party is boycotting the vote, and the bookies are slashing the odds on the bin. Farage resigned as MP over allegations of undeclared donations, then immediately stood for re-election in his own seat. Labour, the Conservatives, the Lib Dems and the Greens have all refused to play along, leaving an intergalactic space warrior in a dustbin helmet as his most prominent challenger. We break down how UK politics reached this point, the infinite by-election loop, and the finest manifesto in modern British history. Chapters 00:00 Farage resigns to save himself 01:35 The infinite by-election loop 03:00 Farage vs Binface, the showdown 04:50 The Binface manifesto 06:45 Why this trial is a farce #NigelFarage #CountBinface #UKPolitics Subscribe to our channel on YouTube Check out our website at temporallyscripted.com Follow us on X, too!

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