The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast

Birth trauma is the dark and sometimes scary side of pregnancy & postpartum that no one wants to talk about. But, we're here to change that! I'm Kayleigh, a licensed therapist and birth trauma survivor, determined to bring birth trauma out of the shadows and into the light. When we talk about birth trauma, we take away its power and leave space for healing. Your birth trauma does not need to “happen for a reason." Birth trauma sucks and it’s okay to admit that. Join us as we navigate what it means to heal from birth trauma. You’ll hear from experts in the field as well as others who have experienced birth trauma. Storytelling and education are keys to raising awareness and better understanding how we heal trauma. We don’t do toxic positivity in this space, but you’ll definitely hear some dark humor. You’ll laugh and you’ll cry, but, most importantly, you’ll learn that you’re not alone and that healing is possible. Birth trauma is bullish*it, but your healing is not.

The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast is a health podcast hosted by Kayleigh Summers, with 274 episodes on record and a Required Pod Score of 80.

Kayleigh Summers hosts The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast, a health show with 274 episodes published.

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  Episode #8

  Ep. 268: From NICU Trauma to NICU Support: Prematurity, NICU Trauma, and Healing feat. Melissa

  Sep 24, 202637 minS5

  In this listener series episode of the Birth Trauma Mama Podcast , Kayleigh sits down with Melissa to hear her story of pregnancy, unexpected complications, premature birth, and an almost six-month NICU stay. Melissa shares how her experience at 25–27 weeks pregnant turned her birth plans upside down and how her son’s congenital heart defect and battle with NEC added layers of fear and uncertainty to an already traumatic experience. But Melissa’s story doesn’t end in the NICU. Six years later, she reflects on the many pieces that have supported her healing: therapy, medication, movement, relationships, community, and ultimately finding meaning in what she experienced. Today, Melissa works as a NICU family support specialist, offering support to families walking through some of the same uncertainty she once experienced herself. This conversation is a beautiful reminder that healing doesn’t erase the pain or grief of what happened. Sometimes, it means learning how to hold the pain and the beauty at the same time. In this episode, we talk about: Experiencing pregnancy complications and an unexpected hospital admission at 25 weeks Spending nearly three weeks on antepartum while trying to keep baby inside as long as possible Finding out her baby had a congenital heart defect and facing uncertainty around his diagnosis Grieving the birth experience she had envisioned and learning to pivot when circumstances changed Letting go of the idea that she had somehow caused or manifested her pregnancy complications Giving birth to her son prematurely at 27 weeks and navigating the immediate NICU experience Her son’s congenital heart defects, surgery, and diagnosis of necrotizing enterocolitis (NEC) Spending almost six months in the NICU The complicated emotions of loving your baby while also being surrounded by medical equipment, alarms, and uncertainty Finding community through other parents and podcasts when she felt isolated during the pandemic Seeking professional support through therapy and medication How trauma and parenthood changed her marriage, identity, and life Learning that healing can be made up of many different pieces rather than one single thing ✨ Finding meaning in her experience six years later Melissa’s full-circle journey of now working as a NICU family support specialist Finding beauty alongside grief and pain without minimizing what happened A reminder that there is no timeline for when someone should be able to find hope or meaning in their birth trauma Melissa’s story is a powerful reminder that you can grieve what happened while also creating a meaningful life beyond it. Healing doesn’t have to mean forgetting, minimizing, or finding a silver lining. Sometimes it simply means becoming curious about who you are now and finding the support you need along the way. For more birth trauma content and a community full of love and support, head to my Instagram at @thebirthtrauma_mama . Learn more about the support and services I offer through The Birth Trauma Mama Therapy & Support Services. Disclaimer - The views and opinions expressed by guests on The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast are their own and do not necessarily reflect the official stance, views, or positions of The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast. The content shared is for informational purposes only and should not be considered as professional or medical advice and/or endorsement.

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  Episode #7

  Ep. 267: Hope After Birth Trauma: Rethinking Birth, Interventions, and Autonomy

  Sep 22, 202647 minS5

  In this episode of the Birth Trauma Mama Podcast , Kayleigh sits down with Lo Mansfield, MSN, RNC-OB, CLC , an OB nurse, educator, mom of four, and creator of The Labor Mama. Lo shares her journey into nursing, what she calls the “art of nursing,” and how her experiences both as a nurse and as a mother have shaped the way she thinks about birth. Kayleigh and Lo dive into the importance of nuance, autonomy, and hope in birth education, especially for people planning a hospital birth after a previous traumatic experience. They talk about the ways that interventions can become unnecessarily stigmatized, why informed consent means having choices in both directions, and how education can prepare you for what happens in a hospital without labeling every intervention as inherently good or bad. They also discuss the power of staying curious, asking questions, understanding the physiological process of labor, and remembering that what happened in a previous birth does not necessarily determine what will happen next time. In this episode: Lo's journey into nursing — How her mother's experience with cancer opened her eyes to the profound impact healthcare providers can have on patients and families. The “art of nursing” — Why the human-to-human connection between a healthcare provider and patient can be just as important as the clinical care itself. Where magic and trauma can happen — How the way a provider responds to a difficult or imperfect clinical situation can dramatically shape a patient's experience. ‍⚕️ Do you have to be a mom to be a great OB nurse? — Lo and Kayleigh discuss the assumption that healthcare providers need to have experienced something personally in order to understand or care for their patients well. Can you have a positive hospital birth? — A nuanced conversation about hospital birth, home birth, birth centers, and the importance of respecting different people's choices about where they feel safest. ⚖️ Autonomy in both directions — Why true autonomy means supporting someone's choice to decline an intervention and someone's choice to have one. Reframing interventions as tools — Inductions, epidurals, cervical exams, and other interventions don't have to be categorized as inherently “good” or “bad.” Understanding the options allows people to make decisions that fit their circumstances. The importance of birth education — Lo explains why understanding what typically happens when you arrive at a hospital can help you feel more prepared and less overwhelmed. Centering hope after birth trauma — Why a previous traumatic birth doesn't mean your next birth will unfold the same way, and why distinguishing between what is possible and what is probable can be so important. The value of a doula — How an additional support person can provide advocacy and continuity, particularly for someone entering birth with a history of trauma. ❓ Stay curious — Ask questions, seek clarification, and understand what is happening rather than allowing your brain to fill in the gaps with fear. Trauma-informed preparation — Kayleigh and Lo discuss the role that therapy and trauma-specific support can play when preparing for a subsequent birth. ✨ Look for what's going right, too — In the middle of worrying about what could go wrong, don't lose sight of the signs that labor is progressing and things are going well. Connect with Lo Lo Mansfield is an OB nurse, childbirth educator, lactation counselor, mom of four, and the creator of The Labor Mama, where she shares evidence-informed education about pregnancy, birth, and postpartum. The Labor Mama: Connect with Lo and explore her birth education resources through her online platform. For more birth trauma content and a community full of love and support, head to my Instagram at @thebirthtrauma_mama . Learn more about the support and services I offer through The Birth Trauma Mama Therapy & Support Services. Disclaimer - The views and opinions expressed by guests on The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast are their own and do not necessarily reflect the official stance, views, or positions of The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast. The content shared is for informational purposes only and should not be considered as professional or medical advice and/or endorsement.

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  Episode #5

  Ep. 265: When the Emergency Is Over, But the Trauma Isn’t: Creating The Post Care

  Sep 14, 202634 minS5

  In this episode of the Birth Trauma Mama Podcast, Kayleigh sits down with Alexsis Gilles, founder of The Postcare, to talk about her experience of birth trauma and the journey that followed. Alexsis shares the story of her daughter Ella’s birth, including a difficult induction, 11 attempts at an epidural, an emergency C-section, a severe hemorrhage, and being separated from her daughter while she received care in the NICU. What became especially difficult was what happened after the emergency was over. Alexsis describes feeling like her traumatic experience was never acknowledged during postpartum care, leaving her to search for answers and support on her own. That experience ultimately became the catalyst for The Postcare, a nonprofit focused on helping people who have experienced traumatic births find community, resources, and meaningful support beyond the traditional postpartum check-in. In this conversation, Alexsis and Kayleigh talk about: Alexsis’s traumatic birth experience and emergency C-section The hemorrhage and terrifying moments she experienced in the operating room Being separated from her daughter for more than 24 hours after birth The grief that can come when the postpartum experience doesn't look anything like you imagined How birth trauma can intersect with previous childhood and complex trauma Alexsis’s experience with EMDR and processing the connections between past and present trauma Postpartum rage, health anxiety, OCD, and the emotions that can emerge after a traumatic birth Why community and a supportive “village” can be such an important part of healing The gaps Alexsis sees in the healthcare system when it comes to supporting people after traumatic births The many forms postpartum support can take — from therapy and resources to meals, community, and simply showing up How The Postcare was created to help people find resources without having to desperately Google for help in the middle of the night Alexsis’s hopes for growing The Postcare, partnering with hospitals, increasing access to resources, and advocating for policy change ✨ The reminder that you don't have to turn your trauma into something meaningful — surviving it is enough And, for those who do feel called to create something from their experience, Alexsis shares what it can look like to turn that passion into advocacy and community support You can connect with Alexsis and learn more about the work she's building through The Postcare: The Postcare: postcare.org Instagram: @thepostcare — Alexsis shares resources, community information, and updates through Instagram. The episode identifies the handle as “the postcare” with an underscore; the website is the most reliable link provided in the episode. TikTok: Search The Postcare on TikTok to find Alexsis and her content. This episode is such an important reminder that what happens after a traumatic birth matters, too — and that no one should have to navigate that aftermath alone. For more birth trauma content and a community full of love and support, head to my Instagram at @thebirthtrauma_mama . Learn more about the support and services I offer through The Birth Trauma Mama Therapy & Support Services. Disclaimer - The views and opinions expressed by guests on The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast are their own and do not necessarily reflect the official stance, views, or positions of The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast. The content shared is for informational purposes only and should not be considered as professional or medical advice and/or endorsement.

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  Episode #4

  Ep. 264: When Care Isn’t Trauma-Informed: Infertility, Sexual Trauma, and Obstetric Violence feat. Liz

  Sep 10, 202648 minS5

  In this episode of the Birth Trauma Mama Podcast, Kayleigh sits down with Liz Gray, a fellow perinatal therapist, to hear her deeply personal story of infertility, birth, sexual trauma, and obstetric violence. Liz shares how her history of sexual trauma shaped her experience with fertility treatment and birth, and how moments of dismissal, lack of empathy, and feeling unseen ultimately contributed to her trauma. Liz’s story is also one of advocacy and turning pain into purpose. After struggling to find trauma-informed support during infertility and birth, she helped create the Trauma-Informed Maternal Health Directory, a nationwide resource designed to connect women and birthing people with providers who understand trauma-informed care. This powerful conversation is a reminder that birth trauma isn’t always about what happens medically, it can also come from what is missing: empathy, autonomy, communication, and being treated like a human being. ✨ In this episode, Liz shares: Her experience as a survivor of sexual trauma and how trauma anniversaries can continue to affect life years later Navigating infertility and fertility treatments as a survivor of sexual trauma The lack of trauma-informed resources available to people experiencing infertility after sexual trauma How a dismissive comment from a fertility doctor became a turning point in Liz’s journey ️ Why asking providers how they practice trauma-informed care can be so important Finding a new fertility provider who made Liz feel seen, heard, and respected Her journey through IVF and pregnancy after infertility Planning for a birth center birth and how an unexpected hospital transfer changed everything The emotional impact of an unexpected transfer from a peaceful birth center environment into a busy hospital How her history of sexual trauma affected her need for autonomy, choice, and control during labor ⚠️ Experiencing dismissive and insensitive treatment from hospital staff during labor Why birth plans can be an important tool for communicating a survivor’s needs—and why they only help if providers actually read them Making the decision to get an epidural after 44 hours of unmedicated labor—and why it was important that the decision remained hers Experiencing a C-section after her baby’s heart rate dropped Discovering the term obstetric violence and having an “aha” moment that helped her understand what she had experienced ❤️ Why birth trauma can come not only from what is done to someone, but also from what is missing—empathy, support, communication, and compassionate care What healing has looked like for Liz, including therapy, medication, writing, and advocacy The creation of the Trauma Informed Maternal Health Directory , a nationwide resource connecting women and birthing people with trauma-informed providers Turning pain into purpose and using her experience to advocate for better care for others Find Liz & the Trauma Informed Maternal Health Directory: maternaltraumasupport.com Instagram: @MaternalTraumaSupport Liz’s infertility advocacy Instagram: @infertilityadvocacy For more birth trauma content and a community full of love and support, head to my Instagram at @thebirthtrauma_mama . Learn more about the support and services I offer through The Birth Trauma Mama Therapy & Support Services. Disclaimer - The views and opinions expressed by guests on The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast are their own and do not necessarily reflect the official stance, views, or positions of The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast. The content shared is for informational purposes only and should not be considered as professional or medical advice and/or endorsement.

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  Episode #3

  Ep. 263: What is a "Positive" Pregnancy & Birth?

  Sep 8, 202636 minS5

  What does it actually mean to have a positive pregnancy experience, especially when we know that birth and postpartum don't always go according to plan? In this episode, Kayleigh sits down with Nina Spears, birth and postpartum doula, childbirth educator, and author of Positive Pregnancy , to talk about preparing for pregnancy, birth, postpartum, and everything in between. Nina shares her unexpected journey into birth work, explains the difference between a baby planner and a doula, and discusses why preparation isn't about guaranteeing a certain birth outcome, it's about giving you the knowledge, tools, and support to navigate whatever happens. They also explore the invisible load of pregnancy, the importance of preparing partners to share that load, and how Nina's book can support those preparing for a subsequent pregnancy after a traumatic birth. In this episode, we talk about: Nina's unexpected journey from working in sales to becoming a baby planner, birth doula, postpartum doula, and childbirth educator What a baby planner is and how that role differs from a birth or postpartum doula How baby planners can help families navigate everything from choosing classes and providers to preparing relationships, homes, and support systems Why Nina wrote Positive Pregnancy as an accessible roadmap for pregnancy that families can use week by week The invisible load of pregnancy and why partners need to take ownership before the baby arrives ❤️ Why preparing for birth doesn't mean you can prevent complications or guarantee a particular outcome ⛰️ Nina's powerful analogy of birth as climbing a mountain —you can prepare, bring the right gear, and hire a guide, but you can't control the weather ✨ Why there is no single "right" way to give birth and why what feels empowering and supportive will look different for every family The difference between being informed and trying to control your birth experience How preparation can help you understand what's happening, participate in decisions, communicate with your care team, and advocate for yourself Why a difficult or unexpected birth outcome isn't automatically traumatic—and why how an experience happens and how you feel throughout it matters How Nina's book can support people who are considering another pregnancy after a traumatic birth and want to approach their next experience differently Why Positive Pregnancy isn't about everything going perfectly, but about feeling informed, supported, respected, and heard ‍♀️ Nina's holistic approach to pregnancy preparation, including mindset, movement, nutrition, relationships, emotional processing, and self-care Why building your village before you need it can be such an important part of preparing for pregnancy and postpartum And the two things Nina believes every pregnant person needs most: education and support Check out Nina's book The Baby Chick Guide to Positive Pregnancy . You can find and follow Nina through her website HERE or message with her on her Instagram . For more birth trauma content and a community full of love and support, head to my Instagram at @thebirthtrauma_mama . Learn more about the support and services I offer through The Birth Trauma Mama Therapy & Support Services. Disclaimer - The views and opinions expressed by guests on The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast are their own and do not necessarily reflect the official stance, views, or positions of The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast. The content shared is for informational purposes only and should not be considered as professional or medical advice and/or endorsement.

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