
Episode #616
Why Being Helpful Keeps You Stuck with Alli Murphy
Most leaders who carry everything already know they're doing it. Alli Murphy did. Four years ago on this show, she named her own patterns, from perfectionism to finding it easier to advocate for her team than for herself. She had a coach. It still nearly broke her. Alli is back to talk about what finally changed. She describes becoming what she calls the Chief Everything Officer, the leader that every decision and fire drill runs through. Then came the weekend a friend joked to her husband on a chairlift that Alli must be a figment of his imagination, since nobody had ever met her. She explains why "just say no" advice falls flat for leaders who were rewarded for the opposite, and why she runs mini-experiments instead, such as a week with no Slack or email in the first hour of the day. She also shares the question her coach asked that she couldn't answer: "What's your definition of enough for a workday?" For HR leaders who are a one-person department, Alli gets practical. List everything you own and question what's only there out of habit. Decide what enough looks like. Use a shutdown ritual so tomorrow starts with a plan instead of an inbox. About our guest Alli Murphy is a leadership coach and speaker who helps women directors and above step out of the Chief Everything Officer role. Through her business, Work & Thrive HQ, she runs The Elevate Lab, a 90-day coaching program, and a free community called the Non-Negotiables Club. Before going out on her own, Alli was a managing director and podcast host at Engage for Good, where she spoke on 700-person stages, led a corporate mastermind, and partnered with brands like Subaru, Hasbro, and Disney. She's a former collegiate athlete, grew up in Mexico City, and lives in Bend, Oregon. She's currently writing a book. TIMESTAMPS 00:00 Intro 02:15 Why Alli walked away from her managing director title 05:00 Why the ambition gap is really a support gap 06:10 How an acquisition made her the Chief Everything Officer 07:20 The chairlift joke that pushed her to get help 11:15 What's your definition of enough for a workday? 15:00 Where the pattern started 18:45 Process integrity vs. outcome integrity 21:05 How you still help when you stop doing it yourself 23:05 Why knowing your patterns isn't enough 25:55 What an HR department of one can do 29:10 Coach the leader or change the company? 30:20 What kept her from leaving sooner 32:05 Where to start A QUICK GLIMPSE INTO OUR PODCAST Podcast: Transform Your Workplace, sponsored by Xenium HR Host: Brandon Laws In Brandon's own words: "The Transform Your Workplace podcast is your go-to source for the latest workplace trends, big ideas, and time-tested methods straight from the mouths of industry experts and respected thought-leaders." About Xenium HR Xenium HR is on a mission to transform workplaces by providing expert outsourced HR and payroll services for small and medium-sized businesses. With a people-first approach, Xenium helps organizations create thriving work environments where employees feel valued and supported. From navigating compliance to enhancing workplace culture, Xenium offers tailored solutions that empower growth and simplify HR. Whether managing employee relations, payroll processing, or implementing impactful training programs, Xenium is the trusted partner businesses rely on to elevate their workplace experience. Discover how Xenium can transform your workplace: Learn more Connect with Alli Murphy: Website LinkedIn Instagram Newsletter The Elevate Lab Connect with Brandon Laws: LinkedIn Instagram About Connect with Xenium HR: Website LinkedIn Facebook Twitter Instagram YouTube

