Two Assholes and a Mic

Just a two "normal dudes", having some drinks and having regular conversation. Conversations will vary, but are none-the-less comical. We will try to veer away from political and religious conversation because not everyone can maintain a respectful means of expressing their views.

Two Assholes and a Mic is a society podcast hosted by Ian, with 48 episodes on record and a Required Pod Score of 80. PitchCentric scores this show on Booking Probability, Listen Score, and live audience signals refreshed every 24 hours.

Ian hosts Two Assholes and a Mic, a society show with 48 episodes published.

Our AI reads these to draft pitches. Use them as grounding for a pitch that cites a real guest and a specific topic.

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  Episode #48

  S2E48 - Box Fans, Butt-Breathing Turtles, and Princess Bride Polls

  Aug 19, 202625 minS2

  Send us Fan Mail In S2E48 , we talk nature walks, questionable drink flavours, beard dye, balding genetics, Costco steaks, missing gravy, and Robby’s continued refusal to buy a box fan. We then test ourselves with ten random facts involving cube-shaped wombat poop, ancient sharks, unicorns, butt-breathing turtles, and an immortal jellyfish—before Robby demands a Facebook poll to decide whether Ian must finally watch The Princess Bride . Support the show

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  Episode #47

  S2E47 - Jupiter Oceans, PS5 Gravity, and Ostrich Wings

  Aug 16, 202629 minS2

  Send us Fan Mail In S2E47 , we fall into a Jupiter rabbit hole involving liquid hydrogen, solid cores, and whether throwing a match at the planet could create a new star. We also debate laying the PS5 flat, watch Robby’s internet turn him into Megatron again, compare meteor showers and eclipses, discuss another Corso puppy, hype fifty-cent Wing Wednesday, and finish with Ian finally getting closer to completing the house purchase. Support the show

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  Episode #46

  S2E46 - Alaska Weed, Pug Zoomies, and Underwater Data Centers

  Aug 14, 202625 minS2

  Send us Fan Mail In S2E46 , Robby checks in from Alaska before flying home as we talk questionable vape flavors, Alaska-grown weed, and Peter Pug getting so excited he nearly shits himself. We also debate AI data centers and renewable-energy storage, hear about Robby’s four-wheeler trip through Alaska, and finish with VA claims, helping adult kids financially, and building credit. Support the show

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  Episode #45

  S2E45 - Shoplifter Takedowns, Tailgaters, and Lettuce Roulette

  Aug 10, 202627 minS2

  Send us Fan Mail In S2E45 , we start with Roxy immediately getting in Robby’s face, old insults making a comeback, kids casually saying things they probably shouldn’t, and Ian trying out new cartridges because the current ones keep clogging. From there, Robby gets ready for Alaska, talks airport arrival habits, and Ian tells the story of Asher wanting to build a giant Zane/Ninjago mech with Robby when he visits. We then get into Power Rangers Megazords, Samsonite being “way off,” and Ian’s unexpected shoplifter takedown after seeing a security guard chasing someone through the shops. The episode also covers Riverside/Starlink connection problems, tailgaters being absolute idiots, fast-lane campers, Autobahn dreams, Robby’s floaty ’66 Mustang, Ian’s dad’s Econoline van, driving old vehicles in the heat with no AC, Alani Witch’s Brew hoarding, panic-buying toilet paper, lettuce recalls, stomach bugs, norovirus horror stories, and the emergency bathroom strategy of choosing whether the toilet or bathtub gets sacrificed first. Support the show

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  Episode #44

  S2E44 - Action Jackson, Bush Planes, and Drunk Beetle Decisions

  Aug 5, 202629 minS2

  Send us Fan Mail In S2E44 , we bring Jackson on for the first time and immediately get into Europe, Tucson heat, brick houses that refuse to cool down, and why Ian’s biggest complaint is still no AC. Jackson talks about his new private jet flying gig, hitting 49 out of 50 states, Alaska float planes, bush pilots, scary little-plane stories, and why he is absolutely not a water-plane guy. We also get into The Secret Life of Walter Mitty , buying art in Europe and accidentally paying more for shipping than the artwork, trains versus planes, getting stuck on the Dallas airport Skylink, flying railroad security for BNSF, catching people by the tracks with heat cameras, and why train thieves apparently wait for thunderstorms. From there, we talk mechanic life, airline benefits, brutal ramp temperatures, Phoenix heat shutting down takeoffs, negative-fifty cold, Robby’s climatic lab memories, cigars, vapes, car wraps, rust, Japan’s strict JCI inspections, Jackson’s GTI engine disaster, Robby’s Beetle still needing wiring and a motor, fun little manual cars, EcoSport Mario Kart energy, drunk Facebook Marketplace decisions, and buying a turbo Beetle because the guy actually drove it down to Tucson. Support the show

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